endings, Jesus, LIFE IN GENERAL

IRONIC

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Image Source: http://www.bluehogreport.com/2013/

09/20/a-highly-ironic-email-courtesy-of-mark-martins-office/

IRONIC.

One single word that describes my 2014. Here’s a background of what I have been through the past year. Well, maybe, irony may seem to be a good thing.

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Removal of Sweetness. The first blow of 2014 came when I was diagnosed with Diabetes Mellitus Type 2 (DM2) in January. I was confined in the hospital for a couple of days, and a not-so-sensitive-doctor told me the bad news that sad night of January 2014. What I really heard from her is “you will have it for life.. you may have complications… when you get pregnant you will have to use insulin…”Pretty much, that’s all the scary stuff. I cried so hard after and I thank God for my Mom and sister who was there with me. 🙂

Sweetness from Another Source. So, after I learned that I had DM2 at age 25, I turned to who I turn to when things get bad.. my best friend Jesus Christ. As fragile as I was that night, I sang praises to him and he comforted me. Everything was going to be okay. (Isn’t my God the sweetest?)

Because my body was not able to handle the travel from Novaliches to Makati, I had to quit my job and rest for a while. Such a difficult decision knowing that I had a promising job at a big company already. But God has his own plans.. and following Him would lead you to where you need to be.

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Hospital. If there was one place that I’ve been to majority of my time in 2014, it would be the Hospital. Why? Because I started working for Manila Doctors. It was one year that brought out the best in me… I believe. I have grown professionally and personally through the things my bosses, colleagues and teammates taught me. I am happier, and my happiness is a personal decision. Despite my physical limitations, I believe I was able to deliver what I can in response to the responsibilities entrusted to me. The highlights of my year was the 40.8% increase of volunteers in the first project I managed with the help of my teammates, boss and the whole Hospital. Then, our hospital’s CSR has become international with our engagement in the UN Global Compact. One of our dearest doctors/Quality Management Representative went to Bali and New York to represent us in 2 different fora meant to create international policies on business for peace and anti-corruption. It was also my first time to attend the Philippine Association of Social Workers, Inc. Biennial Convention. Our hospital was awarded by DOH and DepEd for its contribution to Yolanda Response (DOH) and Adopt-a-School Program (DepEd). For the first time in forever, we also won 3rd place during the Continual Improvement Project competition of the Hospital! Our volunteers also spent their saturdays last Sept, Oct and Nov to cater to teachers in Valenzuela and at our MDH CSR Clinic to give back during the National Teachers Month Celebration. Aside from that, we also finished the Total Wellness Program of more than 90% of the population of our adopted school. We conducted various trainings and workshops to equip and capacitate our partners in the school, community and even those inside the hospital. I learned how to do Family Planning counseling and I was able to practice it. 🙂

Most of all, I enjoyed the camaraderie we all have in MDH especially to my new-found friends Ms. Jill, Eunice, Ma’am Salvs, Ms. Angie, Mama Lisa, Ms. Maan, Sir Pogi, Sir Mel (Happy Birthday!), Sir Julius, Sir Art, Ma’am Sey, Rey (how may I help you), Donna, Dr. Ariel, Dr. Geli, Dr. Myrtle, Dr. Bernal, Dr. Cadiz, Dra. Weng, Dr. Collantes. The Dietary Dept ladies. Dra. Dindee and QM friends. Purchasing people. Ma’am Weng. Sir Ian and Mark, Kuya Rico, Kuya Jess.. People from LHS. Aiko, Paul, Josh and Arnel. Ma’am Jo, Sir Arvin and Sir Rowell (super thanks sir rowell ha!!!) and a whole lot more!

Hospitalization. In the same year, we had 5 hospitalizations with 2 operations in the family ( I was hospitalized 2 times, my 2 brothers had operations, and my mom had mild stroke). How can I say? It was one scary ride. However, we felt God’s presence in our family more. In terms of money, I thank God for Dan’s healthcard (it was a BIG BIG HELP). I also want to thank the kind doctors who helped us… Dr. Morales and Dr. Chua for Mama, Dr. Gene Chan for my brother. I also thank Papa’s health benefits that was used during my other brother’s operation. He was going on 20 then, and the benefits was only until he was 19. Less than 5 days before his 20th bday, he had the operation and we didn’t pay so much. Thank God! So you see… God is good all the time! God is good in sickness. God is good in times of health. Oh! My mom also had no major complications brought about by the stroke. So for me, that’s a major thing to be grateful for!

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TWENTY FOURTEEN. 2014 was a tough year for me and my family. However, God sustained us. He provided. He cared for us. He kept us safe. He healed. He taught us. He ministered to us. He enlightened us. He gave us peace that is beyond understanding. He gave us forgiveness and we were able to forgive others. He strengthened us individually and as a family. He gave us hope. He gave us smiles and laughter. He showed us love. He was there. He is here… and that is enough.

TWENTY FIFTEEN. I am all excited for 2015 for I believe in my heart that it is a year of sowing and reaping. I have great expectations from God for my MA degree, for travels, for my work, for my family and my personal life.

Galatians 6:9 is my 2015 life verse. It says:

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”

Jesus, Uncategorized

My Open Heart Surgery in Hong Kong.



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My heart was cut open. Examined. The blocks were taken out. It was given a renewed flow of blood, and it was healed anew. This pretty much summarizes what I underwent during a heart operation in Hong Kong last August 24-26, 2013.

August 24 (Saturday)

The most ideal day to fly to Hong Kong was Friday. Unfortunately, I had work, and I even had to do overtime. Hence, I flew Saturday. With one hour worth of sleep, I was in the airport at 3 AM. My flight was at 5. Eagerly waiting for my first trip alone and my second trip to Hong Kong, I felt God’s presence stamped all over my pre-departure. 🙂

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During the ride on the plane which was about  2 hours, I had the opportunity to talk with the woman beside me.. and also her husband.They were a nice couple, and our chit chats were very interesting. Besides that, i was also able to commune with my Creator as I was high above the sky. Now, that’s one devotion I will never forget! God told me about Esther, and how she was called to be in her place of position to be able to make a difference in that appointed time. 🙂 I believe God also calls me to be where I am right now because He wants me to do something significant like Queen Esther to her people at that time of oppression of the Jews.

Talking with God high above the clouds gave me assurance that He was with me. So, despite the turbulence on our descent, I felt peace and joy in my heart.

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I arrived at HK International Airport at about 8 AM. I waited for other churchmates to arrive so I can have companions going to the JIL International Center. I got my Octopus Card and had breakfast at Mcdo. This place was special for me, for it is the same place where I had my first breakfast in Hong Kong together with my whole family last March. I waited a bit for my co-YAMs.

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When they arrived, we rode a bus going to Prince Edward and eventually through many untoward circumstances, we arrived at the JIL International Center in Shek Kip Mei.

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My heart surgery started at about 11:30 AM in that place. Pastor Jerome Ocampo was speaking. I missed Pastor Bobot’s first talk. But it was okay. That day, God always reminded me of Romans 8:28, and I know He is in control. Here are a few things that struck me during Pastor Jerome’s message:

  • Do not be scared of testing. JOB had 2 years of testing. From super blessed, he became super mega over blessed after his trials.
  • We want to go through our issues, God wants us to grow through our issues!
  • Hold on to your fork! (The best is yet to come!)
  • If you trust God, you will have a gracious spirit like Daniel.
  • Complaining gets you stuck in the wilderness
  • Don’t belittle your job, if you are excellent, you will shine.
  • Joy is not a mood, it is a muscle. We must exercise it so the joy of the Lord will be our strength.
  • The best is not behind you, it’s right in front of you. The best is yet to come. The best for JIL is yet to come.
  • All you have to do is release the excellent spirit.
  • Even in prison, Joseph became the best. He shifted the destinies of nations.
  • Though you feel like you are in your Babylon, God has a promise for you (Jeremiah 29:11).

Sometimes, I really feel that what I am doing in life and in the ministry is insignificant. At that point, I was thinking too low about myself because of how people treat me. I felt that I was in my Babylon. But God promised me that Babylon is just a phase in life. He has great things in store for me, and He shall give this for His glory.

Other lessons or take aways from the Conference include:

  • “We talk about the second coming, half of the world has never heard of the first.” Oswald Smith
  • Your job is your ministry, your mission.
  • You are the temple of the Holy Spirit and nothing about you is “secular”
  • Missions is no longer about crossing the oceans, jungles or deserts, but about crossing the streets of the city.
  • Our life should shine so that they can see the Lord in us.
  • “My job is a holy, God-given expression of God’s call on my life to advance His Kingdom.”
  • Fulfill your mission, Fulfill your calling.

Pastora Cora shares:

  • “Pag ang Diyos ang nagbigay ng pangarap, nagkakatotoo..” (i feel like cryin again while typing this..)
  • “Wala tayoong binigay sa Panginoon na hindi niya pagyayamanin.
  • When much is given, much is required.
  • Vision Killers: Pride, Lust, Fears.
  • YAM is not personality-centered. This is the Lord’s idea. This is the Lord’s Ministry.
  • YAM – You are Master! 🙂

As God opens my heart to see what is inside it, I believe He was able to see my brokenness, my frailty, my disappointment on myself. I know He saw all my fears, frustrations, sorrow and dreams. I believe that God, during that time, assessed the current state of my heart, and He told me/revealed to me these things.

As he carefully saw the brokenness of my spirit, pastor Bobot’s message came like a breath of fresh air. His teaching was deep but simple. Huge but understandable. It was about the Holy Spirit. I have known the Holy Spirit. I must admit though that I had some notions about Him that was not right. I always thought of Him as a teacher  – He teaches you the right things to do. Yet, another side of teachers also include a disciplinarian – and I deemed Him as such. Having the fear of being a disappointment all my life, I also thought He was someone who would dislike me if I err. Pastor Bobot’s message was simple, but it struck me to the core. He introduced to me the Holy Spirit as a persona so close, so real, so in love with me. He is a teacher indeed, but He is also full of compassion and love just like Jesus and the Father.

As I anointed myself with oil in the head, hands and feet, I just felt really humbled that the God of the Universe would choose to live in me. Someone who could never be proud of anything, I just felt God so close by that I couldn’t stop from crying. God is here. I feel His presence. God redeems. God loves sinners. God wants us to be Holy, and He is there to help us to be holy. He wants to be Holy so we can be one with him. 🙂

The day ended with much joy. Though I didn’t have enough sleep, I felt my spirit energized. God has removed the clot in my blood vessels, and a new energized blood flows in my spiritual veins. 🙂

More than that, I was also able to eat at an all-you-can resto with fellow YAMs in Mong Kok! Along the road, we were able to see a group of young people having a concert in the street near the Ladies Market. They were singing Christian songs in Mandarin! What a way to end the day!

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August 26 (Sunday)

I slept earlier than most of my hotel-mates during the first day because I was tired and sleep-deprived. Since my body clock has adjusted to my early work schedule, I was able to wake up at 5 or 6 am. I took a bath early and went out ahead of others. I went to Tsim Sha Tsui, the place my family and I stayed last March. I ate at Tsui Wah restaurant, our favorite Breakfast place in HK (only to found out later on there was a Tsui Wah resto at the 2nd floor of our hotel). Yet, I had fun traveling alone. :p I had breakfast with God and he told me about Isaiah 40..

15 No, for all the nations of the world

    are but a drop in the bucket.
They are nothing more
    than dust on the scales.
He picks up the whole earth
    as though it were a grain of sand.
16 All the wood in Lebanon’s forests
    and all Lebanon’s animals would not be enough
    to make a burnt offering worthy of our God.
17 The nations of the world are worth nothing to him.
    In his eyes they count for less than nothing—
    mere emptiness and froth.

27 O Jacob, how can you say the Lord does not see your troubles?
    O Israel, how can you say God ignores your rights?
28 Have you never heard?
    Have you never understood?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
    the Creator of all the earth.
He never grows weak or weary.
    No one can measure the depths of his understanding.
29 He gives power to the weak
    and strength to the powerless.
30 Even youths will become weak and tired,
    and young men will fall in exhaustion.
31 But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.
    They will soar high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.
    They will walk and not faint.

There in a foreign land, I was amazed at God’s ownership of the whole world. Surely, He is God not only in the Philippines, but in every nation that ever existed, exists and will exist! My God is strong, and he can provide me strength to overcome the trials that will come my way. God is prompting me that I should trust Him and He will do the rest. 🙂

After such a filling of the body and Spirit, I tried to go to places alone. I still had time before the Sunday Service started. So, I headed to Prince Edward to see the goldfish market and the flower market.

 

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I got lost a bit. But, i eventually found my way. haha! I saw baby turtles for sale! I got caught in the rain, bought an umbrella at 7-11 and spent about 200 pesos for it! Whew. Sa Pinas, 50 pesos lang yun! hehe.

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Then, I went to the JIL Church at  Shek Kip Mei to enjoy God’s presence with my brothers and sisters in Christ. 🙂 During the praise and worship.. I will not forget ever what God told me. Thinking about it makes me cry more and more with gratitude even until this day. Well, God told me in His still small voice.. “Anak. I’m proud of you. You are not a failure. I am proud of what you have done. Though you feel that you have failed me, I am proud of you. Don’t believe the evil one. You were able to fulfill my desires for you in College and until now. Yes, you are not perfect, but you are not a loser. Great things await you.”

With that, I broke down. God telling you how proud He is! I am humbled. He reminded me of things I aspired and worked for to do for Him. Though people may not notice nor remember, He does. My God does. 🙂 This was the healing after the surgery. God moves! God heals! God is good!

The day ended with bonding time with new YAM friends – Ate Hanna, Ate Rhea Salazar and Ate Aimee who works for Compassion International (small world!). 🙂

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We had ice cream at a mobile ice cream store! It was my first time!

We also had to catch the train going back to Yau Ma Tei. We ran all the way to the platform! 🙂 I remember Ate Rhea’s word during our running moment in the walk-alator, citing that the equipment helped us to run faster. 🙂 Kailangan talaga dalawa, mas effective. Hehe. (How I wished Dek was there as well.. Yihee).

August 26 (Monday)

Before flying back to Manila, i spent one more day in HK. I fulfilled some dreams this day! I saw a Panda and a Penguin! YEY!

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I enjoyed Ocean Park alone.994267_10201685259954677_858371035_n

I was also able to conquer a roller coaster! 🙂 I was alone physically, but I really felt God with me.

 

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I went home in Manila with renewed faith, renewed hope.. and a renewed HEART.

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